Feliz Navidad!

So I love Christmas! Yep, it's true! I love the spirit of Christmas through the Christmas songs, Christmas movies, Christmas lights, and ... presents! I still remember the joy I had during Christmas when I got my first Barbie (which was a boy Barbie with a monkey!), my cutesy purple bike, even a trip to Disneyland! I know that loving presents makes me a bad person and furthermore a bad missionary but it's the truth. And this year I received the best Christmas present ever! Are you ready...I finally got my flight plans to Argentina. Yep! That's right! I'm on my way! On Jan. 4, I will be boarding a plan to fly to Argentina, with a layover in Fort Worth, Texas. (Shout out to Al! And Chase who can't read this...) Anyways, I'm pretty dang stoked! Don't get me wrong, I love the MTC but everything has its expiration date and I think the MTC is starting to smell a little sour...Anyways, enough about my sinning ways of loving Christmas presents... MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! I hope you all had an amazing Christmas without me. I have had an exciting week leading up to Christmas. Here's a quick summary for y'all.

"Week Review of Christmas in the MTC" by Hna. Ellsworth
1. Sunday Fireside with MTC Director Bro. Allen, Talk entitled: "Happiness in commercial form." Okay, the talk wasn't really entitled that except by me. Basically the fireside was us watching an hour of those cheesy Mormon commercials and then somehow relating them to our missions. Some of them were kind of a stretch, but it was one of the funnest Sunday firesides ever.
2. Tuesday Devotional with Elder Andersen, Talk entitled "Looking back and Looking Forward." I was very excited to hear from another apostle but I think my favorite part of the fireside was when his grandkids got up and sang "Picture a Christmas." It made me think of the good times and the Nativity Pageant. It was a tear jerker.
3. Christmas Even Devotional with the MTC Presidency and their wives, Talks entitled "Gifts of Hearts, Music, Service, Eternal Life, and Jesus Christ." We had a whole two hour program full of talks, musical numbers, testimonies, and good stuff.
4. Christmas Morning Devotional with Elder Perry, Talk about the Story of Christmas. I love Elder Perry! He brought his family along and they all read the different Christmas stories. It was a great way to celebrate Christmas morning.
5. Christmas Evening Devotional with ???. Okay, so I realize it hasn't happened yet but we're all anticipating who is coming. I have heard a lot of rumors and have ever started a couple myself. My favorite being that the prophet is coming with Donnie and Marie Osmond being the musical number. Some people will believe anything.

Anyways, it really has been a wonderful Christmas. I love seeing the true meaning of Christmas around. I spent my Christmas Even dinner at a table filled with Spanish speakers and I couldn't understand a single word but I absolutely loved it. Every time someone else would join the table, we would all stand up, yell "Feliz Navidad," and hit our glasses together. It was one of the coolest things ever. I wanted to be with my family but then I realized I was with my family. We are all brothers and sisters of our Heavenly Father. We had elders and sisters from Guatemala, Peru, El Salvador, Spain, Mexico, Argentina, and of course the United States; and even though I couldn't understand everything, we still felt like a family. And just seeing the examples of the Christmas spirit around me has made me so happy today. I admit I was feeling a bit home sick this morning, but then an Hermana from Spain came up and gave me a hug and wished me a Merry Christmas. I sit with this girl at meals but we can't hardly understand each other. It was just so sweet and I could feel her Christmas spirit. It's just contagious! So I hope you all are feeling it too and just know that I love you! Merry Christmas!!

Hna. Ellsworth

En serio! con Hna. Ellsworth

So we´re just going to flashback a little bit to the days where I tell a story... because it´s just too hard to figure out what to tell you from week to week. So... this last week, my companion and I have decided to make a goal to sit with Spanish speakers at every meal. This has been really helpful in our Spanish. We sit with about 20 Spanish speakers from South and Central America who we like to call the nativos. So imagine with me, if you will, an entire table of South Americans and two white girls. En serio! It´s a beautiful sight.

Anyways, during a particular meal, I sat by an Elder from Mexico. I talked mostly to the Hermanas but decided to try to start a conversation with this Elder. Just a simple Cómo está? So that´s exactly what I did. And he replied with the usual Estoy bien. But I usually repeat everything they say to make sure I understood it right and that I can also say it right. But I mixed it up a bit and apparentely said something back that meant I was hitting on the poor Elder. I had no idea what I said but he started laughing and then the people next to him started laughing until the entire table was laughing. Apparently, the only thing I can understand in Spanish is laughing. En serio! Anyways, I was pretty embarassed and felt pretty down on myself. How am I going to be able to speak and understand Spanish when I can´t even get a simple greeting right. En serio!

Well, i was feeling down and got back to class and the opening hymn was ´Tengo gozo en mi corazón.´ En serio! I felt like the world was mocking me. I had never felt so frustrated and discouraged with the language or even in the MTC and they throw this song in my face. I couldn´t even sing. And then I got to the middle of the third verse and I started to remember a little bit about humility and patience and started to really listen to the words. I was seriously thinking to myself, Ellsworth, you can probably learn a lesson from this. (Because I usually speak to myself in third person)

So I did learn an important lesson. Spanish is hard. and it´s kicking my trash. But getting discouraged about it won´t help anything. I will fail at times and make a fool of myself but all I can do is laugh at about it and tengo gozo en mi corazón. I was really grateful for that experience and for that hymn. At first I thought Heavenly Father had a sense of humor and was making fun of me, but then I realized it was a tender mercy. And it taught me an important lesson about being happy through frustration.

Well I love ya, Hna. Ellsworth

In the MTC, "weeks are like days and days are like weeks..."

So another week is gone and done and I'm excited to report that I am now teaching lessons completely in Spanish. CRAZY!! Especially because I can't speak Spanish. We have our 'big tests' every Friday night aka tonight, so I'll have to teach the Restoration for the first time in Spanish to someone who actually knows Spanish. I've been practicing all week but it's really hard. Yesterday I was trying to bear my testimony about how Jesus Christ suffered for my sins but accidentally said, "Yo sé que Jesucristo surfrió por mis pescados.¨ I´ll let you figure that one out... I'm pretty much really nervous but I'm just trying to remember to do my best and put my trust in the Lord and he can do the rest.

Well, the devotionals were superb this week. Sunday was fast Sunday so we had mission conference which was amazing! All of the MTC Presidency and their wives spoke. It´s hard to pick a favorite but I´m going to have to go with Bro. Brown because he compared our missions with growing a garden. You know how much I love our garden back home. (Just a tad bit of sarcasm in that last sentence.) He mentioned five things a missionary, and farmer, must do to become a successful missionary. First, we must 'prune' our lives by removing all impurities that would prevent the light of Christ from coming into our lives. Second, we must 'thin' ourselves from the outside world and forget ourselves. Third, we must 'irrigate' our deep roots by personal and companionship study. Fourth, we must 'weed' in our missions which he compared to diligence and work. Be diligent, steady, energetic. I still remember our early morning field trips to weed the garden, so I appreciated this analogy the best. Lastly, we must 'spray' the garden which he compared to faithful daily prayer, fasting, and keeping the commandments. I'm a big fan of the analogies so I really appreciated this talk and it taught me a little more about being a successful missionary.

Tuesday night devotional was one of my favorite devotionals I've heard thus far. It was Elder Costa on the importance of planning and teaching by the Spirit. He was very funny and still taught important principles. I think my favorite part was just about putting yourselves in the hands of the Lord. It made me think of Sis. Ellsworth's (aka Kris) email this week in her Tender Mercy. I just have to remember to put all my trust in the Lord and then I can be an instrument in his hands.

Anyways, Christmas is coming!! I'm excited to spend it in the MTC! I'll be excited to know what we will do for it, but whatever it is, I know it will be great! I'm glad to hear all is well! Thanks for the Christmas tree! It pretty much made my week! Okay, well, there are way too many exclamation marks in this paragraph, so... k... bye!

Hna. Ellsworth

The District

Hermana Ellsworth seems to be the 'white sheep' in the the district

i went to the MTC for a month and all i got was this lousy t-shirt...

December 4, 2009

Today I have hit my one month mark aka my halfway mark of the MTC. Can i get a woot, woot?! Time flies when you're having fun! It really does feel like I just got here yesterday. Crazy! Anyways, since it has been exactly a month, I feel it is time to do an inventory. A sort of "Top Ten Things I've Learned in the MTC" (Not at all comparable with David Letterman) This should be interesting but here we go...

10. After being one of the only Hermanas that plays basketball during gym, I have learned to beat every Elder in my gym in the basketball game Speed.

9. I have learned how to tell the story of "La Princesa de la Bolsa de Papel" in Spanish, sorta'. Our district made this goal to talk Spanish all the time and I wanted to tell one of my roommates that story. It took me a while but she understood the most part. It was muy bien.

8. And to continue on the lines of Spanish, I have learned over 500 vocab words, how to conjugate verbs in present tense, preterite, present progressive, and command. I have learned direct objects, indirect objects, and reflexive verbs. And I can pray, testify, contact, and teach someone how to pray in Spanish. Miracles do happen in the MTC!

7. I have learned patience to deal with thousands of 19-year-olds boys. Need I say more?

6. I have learned to sit in class for over three hours without falling asleep. Definitely never learned that in high school/college. ;)

5. I have learned that I look forward to 1:00 and 6:00 aka Mail time. I'm embarrassed by it, but I succumbed to the temptation. Highlight of the month - Letter from Dad and Grandpa in the same day - Happy Day!

4. I have learned the most valuable time of the day is personal study and/or companion study. I never have been able to use my study time so effectively and efficiently before, and I am grateful to have that time everyday to study the scriptures and Preach My Gospel.

3. I have known and learned more about the Restoration of the true Gospel. I know that Joseph Smith was a true prophet, and I am grateful that a humble, young boy came across the scripture James 1:5 and decided to know for himself which one of the churches was true.

2. I have already known but learned more that I am a child of God. He loves me and has a perfect plan for me for my happiness. His ultimate goal is so that I can return to live with Him someday and be with my family forever.

1. I have already known but learned more that Jesus Christ is central to that perfect plan and that He came to this earth to atone for my sins. He overcame sin and physical death so that it is possible for me to return to His presence. I know and feel His love ever so strongly while I am here in the MTC.

Well, I hope that wasn't too 'David Letterman' for you. But I am really grateful that I am here in the MTC and learning what I am learning. This really is an amazing place, and I'm glad that I'm here for another month; and I just hope that I continue to learn as much as I possibly can. I love you all!!

Hna. Ellsworth

Happy Day!

The anticipation was building. The suspense was painful. Whispering could be hard throughout the entire gym. Bets were being taken to wager which apostle was coming. I placed my bet of a candy bar on Elder Andersen due to my sources. Ever eye was watching the "chosen door" that would soon be opened for an apostle of God. Bro. Angus (a very ominous looking man) kept walking through that "chosen door" just to torture us. While waiting, guesses had been eliminated to two choices. Elder Oaks or Elder Andersen? The suspense was killing me. But then, as we were singing the last verse of "O Thou Rock of Our Redeemer," Elder Oaks in all his apostle/supreme court judge majesty walked through the doors. Apparently my sources were faulty, but it was worth losing a candy bar. My favorite part was when every Elder and Sister in the room stood a little taller and sang a little louder for an apostle of the Lord. It was truly power or shall I say... AMAZING!

Elder Oaks and his wife spoke to us. Sis. Oaks was so cute, I love her sense of humor. Speaking of humor, did you know that Elder Oaks is a shoulder laugher. I never knew. And he also quoted "Wicked" in his talk. Oh the irony! Anyways, I loved Elder Oaks' talk. I have never taken so many notes in all my life. I just want to tell you my favorite part because there's so much more to report of the week. My favorite part was the three different challenges we would face as missionaries and in life in general. Face the challenge to change, to achieve, and to become. To become a missionary, I need to have a "mighty change of heart" and be converted. Elder Oaks had trouble describing it but he said "To become a missionary is to get something to happen within." I may not know exactly what that means, but it gives me something to think about and work on.

Two days later, the anticipation and suspense was back. Well maybe not so much suspense. It had already been confirmed that Elder Holland and his wife was coming for Thanksgiving. I feel so blessed to have heard from two apostles in less than three days. I love it! Elder Holland's devotional was a question and answer forum that was very enlightening. But I'll just share my favorite part again. He describes that all of us missionaries are diamonds that need refinement and pressure. Life is hard but we need it to be, so we can become disciples of God. He shared a poem that basically said, we needed to push to the edge. Even if we are afraid to fall, we need to continue to push to the edge. And then when we get there, the Lord will push us and then we can fly. I'm not sure if I explained that clearly enough, but let me just say that it was great. I also loved it when Elder Holland testified. His testimony is so strong and I always love hearing it.

Anyways, that was pretty much the highlight of my Thanksgiving. We also did humanitarian service and I studied Spanish for a few hours. Oh and there was the whole Thanksgiving dinner part, but it just wasn't the same without family. But it was still good. I was grateful to be in the MTC for Thanksgiving.

Well, that's basically it. I'm still just working on the Spanish and Preach My Gospel. We lost a few Elders in our district this week. Not lost, they just headed out to the MTC in the Dominican Republican. They have a few more weeks there and then they'll be in Puerto Rico. Now there's just seven of us left and we're all heading to Cordoba Argentina on January 4th or 5th (i forget which one.) I can't wait! But I know that I have tons more to learn before then.

I love you and miss you and hope you all had an amazing Thanksgiving!

Hna. Ellsworth

The Kingdom of God or Nothing!

I have had another amazing week but I think my favorite days at the MTC are Sundays. I absolutely love the schedules and being constantly busy with meetings. Last Sunday was amazing in that I got to hear from Sis. Oaks (yes, the wife of Elder Oaks) and Sis. Sheri Dew. It was (can i say it again?) amazing!

Sis. Oaks came and talked to us in Relief Society. I never knew about Sis. Oak's story in that she was single all of her life and then married an apostle at age 55! She was such a sweet lady. The title of her talk was "The Kingdom of God or Nothing!" and she mostly talked on the five points of a testimony and then gave us a testimony glove, an idea from the Primary "Friend." I'm excited to use it in one of my lessons.

So tender mercy of the week. Sis. Dickey and I loved Sis. Oak's talk and loved getting to know her story about being single so long and we started talking about it and then Sis. Dew's name came up. We both went on about how we loved Sis. Dew and how amazing she is, not knowing that she was giving that night's devotional. And then that night we had a devotional with Sis. Sheri Dew. I love when we recieve blessings like that. Anyway, her talk was one of the most amazing talks I've ever heard. It was on how to become a greater follower of righteousness and seeker of greater knowledge. She gave us three ways to do that. 1. Learn who you are and that you are a child of God. 2. Come to understand the Savior's Atonement and what it can do for you. 3. Learn to hear the voice of the Lord and recieve revelation from Him. It was truly an (just one more time) AMAZING talk! I love being here at the MTC and hearing talks like that.

Well, the Spanish is still coming, slowly but surely. I did my first door contact in Spanish. It was pretty shaky but I can definitely see the improvement from just two weeks. I have a test tonight where I need to get to know an investigator (they're pretend investigators aka volunteers usually from BYU) and talk to them in Spanish for about fifteen minutes. I'm really nervous about it but I know I can do it if I put my trust in the Lord. We then get to teach the first lesson in English. I just love the MTC and everything we're learning!

Love ya, Hna. Ellsworth

Time flies when you're having fun...

It pretty much feels like I wrote you yesterday. This week has literally flown by. You would think that spending my days in class for about twelve hours would seem like forever, but it almost feels like there's not enough time in the day to get everything done. There's just so much information to learn and I feel so inadequate to learn it. But I've learned that if I try my best and then put my trust in the Lord then everything works out.

The language is going great! I love learning Spanish! We've been working on vocabulary and conjugations and how to make a door contact all in Spanish. It's coming slowly but I'm starting to form sentences and understand some of the Spanish that is being. Today we have our first test to see if we can have a full out fifteen minute conversation in Spanish just meeting someone in a park and then testifying to them. I just can't believe how much Spanish is being taught in just one week! It is the definitely the gift of tongues promised from Heavenly Father because I know I couldn't do it myself.

Although Spanish is going great, I'm struggling with teaching Preach My Gospel. We had our first run through of the first lesson and it was way harder than I would've ever imagined. They told us that we needed to teach the person not the lesson. So I obviously have a lot to learn but I'm not too worried about it. I won't give up. I just figure that I was doing too well in Spanish so Heavenly Father figured he needed to humble me a bit with teaching.

I'm still loving the MTC and everything. My companion Hma. Dickey is amazing! We have a rock solid companionship and I'm so grateful for it. She gets me up for 6 am aerobics and talks me into doing the Referral Center. The Referral center used to terrify me because I didn't have the confidence to just talk to complete strangers on the phone but now I love it. I had an hour and half conversation with someone on mormon.org chat. I had to get to class but she still wanted to hear more. I just love the MTC!

Shocker of the week... I joined the MTC choir. I'm pretty much tone deaf but they let me in anyways. We sang for the Tuesday devotional which was awesome. It was a statistical update on temples. I really enjoyed it but the devotional review was even better. We have about an hour to review the devotional with our district and the Spirit was so strong. We have a great district.

Well, I'm just kind of blabbing on now. But I am so grateful for the opportunity to serve as a missionary. I love this gospel and I'm so grateful for the knowledge that I am a daughter of a Heavenly Father who loves me. The Church is true!!

Hma. Ellsworth

Bring it! (1st email from the MTC)

I'm finally here!! It has been a crazy couple of days in the MTC. There is just so much going on around here and so much to learn. I absolutely love it!! Let's see what I can tell you... first of all, as you can assume I got to the MTC safely thanks to Jeff and Al. I'm sorry if i was boring for them. They wanted to do something special for my birthday but all I could think about was getting to the MTC. Thanks for trying though and I'm sorry I was a bum, but I had a great time with you all.

I reported at around noon and was feeling a bit overwhelmed with all these new things to learn and remember. And i'm pretty sure I got lost about a dozen times just in my first day. But I've decided that my motto is "Bring It!" There is a lot of new stuff happening but I know that Heavenly Father won't give me more than I can handle. So just keep it coming because I'm ready for it!

Anyways, my companion is pretty much amazing! Her name is Hermana Dickey and we immediately clicked. We've decided that we probably met in the pre-mortal life and broke out into song. (Sorry! Last time I ever allude to Saturday's Warrior ever again!) We have a lot of fun together, probably too much fun but we 're going to work on that. She is definitely helping me to strive to be better in everything that I do and I am so grateful to have her as a companion.
I absolutely love my classes. We have already started studying the gospel and learning Spanish.

I can pray, testify, and do the door approach in Spanish already. I'm pretty sure that I've learned more Spanish in the last three days than in my entire two and a half years of school Spanish. The MTC is truly an amazing place and miracles are happening everyone.
Speaking of miracles, I am definitely getting up at 5:45 in the morning to do an optional aerobics class for the sisters. I know that you prolly don't believe I am capable of getting out of bed before 9 am, but it is true. It is a lot of fun and helps me to wake up for the day. I love it! I'm definitely working on my six pack. but i digress...

I probably should tell you that I have an amazing district. We had our first Branch Presidency Meeting and the Spirit was so strong. Our Branch President is Pres. Shumway and he is great. He taught us a few things about obedience, diligence, patience, and other key attributes to being a good missionary. I'm very excited for our district and branch.

Well, besides studying the scriptures and learning Spanish, there's not much else to say. Just know that I have a testimony of the gospel that I know it is true. I am grateful for the opportunity to serve as a missionary and that the Lord blesses His missionaries with the Spirit and the gift of tongues. I am going to work as hard as I can and be obedient.

Thanks for the all the letters and package! It was exciting to have a whole pile waiting for me yesterday. And thanks for writing that you don't miss me. It really helped me stay focused on my purpose knowing that my family is glad that i'm out of the house. jk. I love you and miss you! k bye!

Love,
Hermana Ellsworth

Setting Apart and Airport Pictures

Entering in at the gate

Ascending up

Stacy & Hermana Ellsworth

Rachel is excited to have her own room again

Mission: Possible

Hermana Ellsworth & President Bradshaw

See ya in 18 months!

I am very happy to share that the countdown to reporting to the MTC is down to three days. Can I get a woot woot?! I feel like I have been waiting for this day forever. I thought it would never come. I am just so excited to serve and teach the gospel to the people of Cordoba, Argentina. I feel very grateful to have the opportunity to serve the Lord and learn the beautiful language of Spanish.

This week I decided to memorize one of my favorite scriptures and my new mission motto in Spanish. The scripture is D&C 82:10 - "I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise." I figured it won't matter what trials happen to me in Argentina, as long as I obey all the mission rules. Obedience is the first law of heaven. Of all the advice I have recieved from returned missionaries, every single person had one thing to say in common - Obedience.


Moral of the Story - Thus I will go and do and obey!

Mission Address:
Sister Noralin Ellsworth
Argentina Cordoba Mission
Gay Lussac 5270
Apartado Postal No 49-X5009 ZAA
5009 Villa Belgrano, Cordoba
C.C. 17 Suc 9
Cordoba, Argentina

Peace, Love, and Curse Words

So I got into my first car accident last week... possibly one of the most traumatic experiences of my life, which should make for a good blog. So here we go. Over a week ago, I was asked to babysit for a delightful family for the entire day. All I had to do was babysit a little girl named Sadie who is in my nursery and her older brother Drew who would be gone half the day for Kindergarten. I'm thinking piece of cake. ya, not so much. Sadie was missing her parents and crying most of the morning. So after I tried everything else, I promised to take her to my farm so she could see the animals. She was content with that. So we headed over to my house. So I have always had this fear of driving other people's cars. I've never been in an accident before or anything, I just don't feel comfortable driving other people's vehicles. But I had no other choice and I buckled Sadie in and we headed out. I was being very cautious and using every turn signal and staying under the speed limit. I was doing everything right and yet the world still hates me. I was turning into my little dirt road and some red truck behind me tries to pass me on a residential street and runs into my car. And when I say my car, I actually mean their car. It was only a scratch and no one was hurt which was a tender mercy. I figured I would just exchange information real quick and it wouldn't be a huge deal. So I get out of the car to find a fifty-year-old biker hippie. Long scraggly beard, tiedye shirt, leather vest, chains, the whole shebang. He was very nice and asked if we were alright. He even called me darling. But then I suggested exchanging insurance information and he starts crying. He explained how he couldn't afford his insurance going up any more. I tried to be sympathetic but reminded him that we needed to exchange info. He then started yelling curse words to the sky. Seriously, yelling. I had neighbors looking out their windows wondering what this guy was doing. I nicely asked him to calm down and brought attention to a scared two-year-old in the back seat. He apologized and called me darling again but then again went back to shouting curse words. So I called my mom outside and took Sadie quickly inside before she learned an entirely new vocabulary. We then had to call the police and everything was quickly resolved. I spent the rest of the day babysitting two kids and trying to get Sadie to stop saying "darn it." (edited)

Moral of the Story - I'm never babysitting again.

Elizabeth Mae

My first experience as an aunt proved to be an enlightening one. . . babies hate me. I've always had this suspicion but I've carefully avoided babies for the last twenty years to avoid making that suspicion a reality. But for the first time in my life, I finally had a niece. (It's about time!) Elizabeth Mae Miller was born August 12, 2009. Liz was 6 pounds 14 ounces and 20 1/2 inches long. Mae's as beautiful as a baby can be. I went to the hospital to hold my favorite niece for the first time and it turns out that Beth was ready for me. I had only been holding Lizzy for about ten seconds before she took a huge dump in her diaper for me. Ten seconds later, Betty decided to do it again. Before I had the chance to hand Lizzy Mae over to her dad for a diaper change, Elizabeth decided to spit up her entire meal. In the thirty-eight seconds I was holding her, Betsy pooped twice and puked on me. What a precious little miracle. I was there for about an hour and half and that minute I held her was the only one that Eliza decided to puke or poop on anyone. Apparently, I'm her favorite.

Moral of the Story - Since Miller has about a dozen different nicknames, I can pretty much call her anything I want. I'm going to go with Harley. Welcome to the world Harley!

I've Got a Feeling

There are few things in this world that make me truly happy - family, friends, Chuck Norris, etc. But also on this list is music. No matter if I'm stressed or tired or angry, music is my happy place. If I were Peter Pan, my happy thought would be my favorite song of the week, which just so happens to be "I've Got a Feeling" by Black Eyed Peas. It's a wonderful song, a bit overplayed on the radio, but what great song isn't. Anyways, I worked eight hours at Payless and it was no picnic. Since we have Back to School Sales going on, it's been crazy busy and entirely no fun. Just imagine measuring smelly kids' feet all day. No fun. But I finally got off work and got in my car to drive home. While driving, my favorite song came on. My entire day went from miserable to happiness in .2 seconds. So I stopped at a red light at Southern and Harris. I could've turned right but I chose to pause and take it all in. So I turned up my radio as loud as it goes and rolled down all the windows. I then proceeded to perform the best car dancing of my entire life. I was busting it up for about half a minute when I looked over to the car next to me. To my dismay, it turned out to be a cop car. He was staring at me and instead of a smile on his face, he ominously shook his head at me. I hung my head in fake shame and turned off my music and then turned right onto Southern. I waited for half a mile to see if he was following me. When the coast was clear I cranked my music back up and continued my wicked car dancing moves.

Moral of the Story: My mother hoped I had learned a lesson from this experience and I have. Here it is... Always check for cops before car dancing.

Roadtrippy!

So my brother got married, which only means one thing - ROADTRIP! I loaded up in the truck with two of my smelly sisters and parents and roadtripped it to Oregon. It was a party! I was in a real life game of Oregon Trail. My sister almost died of dysentary and I killed over three thousand pounds of buffalo but I could only carry ten pounds back. But I digress...

We went on the coolest River Rafting Trip ever! One of the coolest things I've ever done in my life, exception being the time I pulled the lever for the chemical shower in the science lab. We also went Temple hopping - we saw 6 temples and went in three of them. I also saw tons of cool family like my grandparents (my grandpa thinks i'm lippy, whatever that means), my aunt Suzie and uncle Lowell, and my aunt Lori and uncle Mark in Idaho. It was a party! That was our awesome week - river rafting, temple hopping, and family. oh and I almost forgot, my brother got married. that was fun too, i guess. there was the wedding, and the reception, and the luncheon (i gave a tear jerking toast... written by my sister. apparently i'm not trusted with saying anything in front of strangers without a script), and decorating the car. It was cool.

And this is our High School Musical pose picture. While ditching the reception, we took the opportunity to take pictures that included the HSM pose and tree hugging. You just haven't experienced Oregon until you've been a tree hugging hippie. i'm just sayin'...

Moral of the Story: It's only creepy if you make it creepy.

Another reason i love wistie...

http://wistie.blogspot.com/2009/07/r-r-random.html

Moral of the Story: Wistie puts the dang love in random. it's there, look for it.

Our Fallen Fowl Friend

On June 25, 2009, three memorable beings died. The King of Pop, Charlie's Angel, and Ed Bert. Ed Bert passed on from this bitter cruel world. She died from heat exhaustion under the triple digits of the Arizona sun. I tried to do everything I could to save her. But I was too late and she moved on to a big bird heaven in the sky. But to make sure I sent her off in style. And yes, I wrote that correctly. Ed bert is indeed a female chicken aka a hen. I might have named her after she died and I apparently do not know the difference between a hen or a rooster. But i digress. I was determined to give Ed bert a funeral that any chicken would be proud of. My dad wanted to just throw her in the trash can but I felt it was my harry potteric duty to dig a grave and bury him personally. So after an eight hour shift at Payless, I came home to dig a hole at the hottest part of the day. But before I continue, let me describe his cemetary location. Our roping shoot, I recently discovered, is an illegal graveyard for horses and cows. Picture Lion King, if you will, with the elephant graveyard. Pretty much the same idea. So I chose an ideal spot next to the Jeep with a prime view of the McDonald's arch and started digging. The cows just happened to be in the roping shoot and they joined the circle to remember their fallen fowl friend. I spent about an hour digging a grave worthy of chicken royalty. Then the funeral service began. Nothing was lacking. We obviously had a vicar, which i just recently found out is a clergical officiator. Bishop Ellsworth was there to offer a beautiful eulogy. And I might be mistaken but I think I saw a tear in one of the cow's eyes. We then had a musical number provided by my iPod - Wind Beneath My Wings by Bette Midler. It was a beautiful ceremony.

Moral of the Story - Never invite a cow to a funeral. (Apparently, cows are not respectful of the dead. As I left the funeral service, I watched as a cow walked over and micturated on the newly dug grave. And that is why I will never bury a cow. That and because I'll prolly eat him for dinner.)

Saturday Schedule to Stimulate a Soporific Set

Do you remember in Sesame Street when they used to dedicate each episode to a certain letter? Well. . . yesterday I went back to my childhood years and took a leaf out of Big Bird's book. Yesterday was sponsored by the letter S.

Saturday Schemes
Sleepover with Stacy
Service at Salk Elementary School
Sleep
Swimming
Sun Bathing
Sun Burning
Strawberry Limeades at Sonic
Shopping at Superstition Springs for Senior pictures shirts (beat that!)
Service at Schaubs
Psych - Shawn in Santa Barbara
Sterling date
Snack - Chocolate cake at Wal-mart. (ok, kind of a stretch. but i was really craving choco cake!)
Watch SNL on Sesame Street
Psych again - (ok, so it starts with a 'p' but it has a 's' sound. so sue me!)

Moral of the Story - Ironically enough Stacy was never allowed to watch Sesame Street as a child. Apparently talking puppets are a poor substitute for teachers no matter how knowledgeable they are about the alphabet.

Beethoviphobia

I have recently discovered that I have topophobia, the fear of certain situations. A bit vauge, I admit, but let me explain. At first I thought I had glossophobia, the fear of public speaking. However, I have no fear of talking in front of people, but I do get stage fright in certain situations. What are these certain situations? Well, I’m afraid of anything that includes performing on a piano. I know it sounds strange, but it's legite. I tried to find a cooler name for it like Beethoviphobia but I pretty much just made that up. Anyways, I realized the symptoms last Saturday at a Baptism. I got called last minute to play the closing hymn. I figured I would be okay because I’m usually pretty good at playing the piano, at least when no one is listening. So I started to play the hymn and the hymn book closed on me and I definitely messed it up and it just went down hill from there. A girl helped me keep the book open and I tried to keep playing but I was already behind and I just kept messing it up worse and worse. The entire program was a perfectly spiritual baptism, and I managed to end it on bad note. [Pun intended]. The most ironic part was the title of the hymn, “There is Sunshine in my Soul Today.” Not me. All I felt was physical distress, nausea, and feelings of panic. I finished the hymn in embarrassment and practically ran out of there after the closing prayer, before anyone could give me pity compliments. (You know what I’m talking about). It was possibly one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. When I got home I sat down at the piano to try to play the song again and I played it perfect. So I have to conclude that I have a fear of playing the piano in front of an audience. This was not my first experience like this and it won’t be my last. I can play many songs in the comfort of my own home, but in front of an audience I tense up. And when I say tense up, I mean my entire body starts shaking and I break out in cold sweat. It's not a pretty picture... or smell.

Moral of the Story: Don't complain to me about having a low self-esteem until you have had a couple dozen kids under the age of 12 laugh at you.

Houseisms

So I have started a new TV series.  Last summer was Gilmore Girils, which is still my absolute favorite show.  This summer is House, also an amazing show but for different reasons.  The best part of the show is Houseisms, and I hope someday to talk like House.  Give or take...

Top Ten Houseisms

"I'm the doctor who's trying to save your son.  You're the mom letting him die.  Clarification.  It's a beautiful thing."

"What are those?  Candy canes?  Are you mocking me?!"

"...there's no I in 'team'. There is a me, though, if you jumble it up." 

"Humanity is overrated." 

"That's a catchy diagnosis, you could dance to that." 

"There is not a thin line between love and hate. There is --- in fact --- a Great Wall of China with armed sentries posted every 20 feet between love and hate." 

"I know you can't talk, so I need you to look petrified if you consent."

"Do I get extra points if I act like I care?"

(To the mother of a crying baby) "Give her 20 milligrams of antihistamines. It could save her life. Cause if she doesn't shut up, I'll kill her."

"But not to worry, because for most of you, this job could be done by a monkey with a bottle of Motrin. Speaking of which, if you're particularly annoying, you may see me reach for this: this is Vicodin. It's mine! You can't have any! And no, I do not have a pain management problem, I have a pain problem... but who knows? Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm too stoned to tell. So, who wants me?"

Moral of the Story:  I respectfully decline to write a moral for this blog in the arguement that there are no morals in House.  How can you not love this show??

Customer Service

So I started work this last week.  I am proud to announce that I am full-time sales associate at Payless Shoes.  During the last week, I have made a new realization.  People are slobs.  I don't understand how people can trash stores and not care.  I don't understand how people can let their kids run around like hellians.  I don't understand why people can treat sales associates like dirt.  So I have decided, when I become president, I am going to make a law that every person should work customer service sometime in their lives.  I like working at Payless and all but I have a new understanding for customer service...  It stinks. 

Moral of the Story - The customer is always right... when they're in the store.  Once they are out of that door, they lose all immunity.  News flash: the dart board with pictures of customers is real.  very, very real.

Princess

The other night I watched the new ABC Family Original Movie entitled "Princess."  I thought it had potential -  A modern fairy tale, ABC Family, and Sunshine from "Remember the Titans" all had it going for the movie.  However, I failed to notice the skunk in the background of the poster which foreshadows the overall presentation of the movie.  It stinks!  The movie is about a princess named Ithaca (i bet she had a hard childhood with a name like that) who can talk to animals and mythical creatures and heal them.  She is trying to find the chosen one she must pass down her crown to.  She only makes an appearance once a year to the outside world so that she can find the Searcher aka "Sunshine" who she thought would find her successor. However, Sunshine just thought she was pretty and played along in ignorance of who she really was and what she really wanted.  If that sounds confusing, it's because it is.  And it only gets worse from there.  You meet mermaids, fairies, giant squids, and bad actors from then on.  My personal favorite was the three headed dragon who was just misunderstood.  The most confusing part associated with the movie is that I liked it.  Even after all of the bad acting and insane plot line, I was left wanting more.  I found myself watching the movie again with my little sister and I'll probably watch it again when Kristi gets in town.  (shout out to Kris.  I can see you liking this movie just because of the mythical creatures.)  It makes no sense to me but I guess I just love cheesy.

Moral of the Story: Never judge a movie by its front cover but you can judge a movie by it's back cover.  Read the summary before buying the movie.  That would've been helpful years ago when choosing Fern Gully 2.

Obama is a baby . . .

So I spent seven hours yesterday in the sweltering heat just to hear Obama whine about not getting an honorary degree.  Due to security purposes for the ASU Graduation, we were required to be there four hours early to wait in the 100 degree weather.  But I wasn't bitter.  I had the opportunity to hear the President of the United States.  However, I did become bitter when he kept bringing up his lack of honorary doctorate.  Get over it, buddy!  Also, it felt more like a State of the Union address than a commencement.  Why do people have to cheer after every sentence?!  We get the point!  I kept thinking, "Great!  You all love Obama.  Now shut up!"  But I'm glad that I went so I could support Emily getting her Master's Degree in Education.  Go EM!!  Even if she didn't want to be there and read the entire time.  I found out later the book was "To Kill a Mockingbird."  Oh the irony!  It's little things like that that make me happy.

Moral of the Story:  Obama would rather get a honorary degree rather than be honored with helping students with scholarships to get to college.  Barack, your altruism amazes me!  It says a lot about your stand on education . . .  

Really?!? with Nori - SNL: Jury Duty

So I spent fifteen hours at jury duty in the last two days which brings me to the segment i like to call . . . Really?!? with Nori. So, I spent four hours on the light rail just to get to pheonix and back. But I met some delightful people while on it. In the very first hour on the light rail, I recieved two phone numbers from Sam and Jerry. Not to be confused with the cat and mouse rivalry nor the ice cream product. They were two creepy forty-year-old men who chose to hit on a twenty-year-old. i mean, really? Really?!? Then I get to Phoenix and got off the wrong stop. So I walked about five blocks to where I needed to be. During the walk a thirty-year-old man who was only wearing spandex decided to run up to me and tell me I had beautiful hair. i mean, really?! keep it to yourself buddy, the comment and the show of skin. no one wants to see that. then I went to the wrong building so another thirty-year-old man decided to help me find the right one, which just happened to be the really big one right next to it. really?! i know I am not the brightest crayon in the box, but I'm pretty sure I could've figured it out. I finally got in the right room and waited there for five hours. I read Twilight (that whole book can be an entire segment of really?!?), I watched Marley and Me (the dog dies, not so much a shocker), and looked around at strange looking people. I don't know how people can just leave their house looking the way they do. I am no fashion expert, but whoever thought a - Stones tube dress, brown polka dotted Elizabethan-esque shrug, shiny too tight leggings, hot pink halter top, and her lacy bra poking out of the top - was a good idea is seriously disturbed. i mean, really?!? When I finally got into the courtroom for the jury selection process, everyone decided it was a good time to tell the the judge not only about their kids but also all of their eight pets. No one cares! we don't want to know how you met your wife or who introduced you to her, they just want a yes or no answer if you're married. And i'm sorry that your car got stolen twenty years ago and they never caught the perp, but we don't want to listen to a fifteen minute venting session on it. Just yes or no people! And when they ask a question, listen! Don't ask the judge and attorneys to repeat it six times!! really?! it's not that difficult! So since everyone decided to tell their life stories, we were in there for four hours until closing time. So the judge told us all to come back the next day but only after he told us the origin of cinco de mayo. really?! why didn't you just use that ten minutes to pick the jury buddy! so i went back the next day with a book and headphones so that i could ignore all people. When I finally got there, the defendant took the plea bargan and we were all dismissed. really?! you couldn't have decided that months ago! but i guess then i wouldn't have got to learn about the lives of fifty strangers. i'm just glad that i wasted fifteen hours of my life on the judicial system.

Moral of the Story: “Parents, if your kid says Michael Phelps smokes pot, why can’t I? Say you can, as soon as you win 12 gold medals for your country.”

The Road to Eternal Marriage Has Never Been Longer

I had my first experience of a Singles Ward this last Sunday. I guess that's not entirely true. I have been going to a singles ward at BYU for the last two years but BYU wards are in an entirely different category. Anyway, I go into our stake's singles ward which starts at 3:00, which by the way is ridiculous. No church should start that late. So I get there about five minutes early and practically no one is there. Everyone still shows up late even when it starts at 3. So a few minutes after the meeting starts, this guy comes in and sits by me. We'll call him Joe, which may or may not be his real name. Joe starts chatting it up with me. He wanted me to talk to him, so in effort to not hurt his feelings, I told him I would but I lost my voice. To which he quickly replied, "That's fine. I can talk enough for the both of us." Oh joy! I just wanted to enjoy sacrament meeting without being hit on. Finally the meeting concluded, which just so happened to be on charity, and yet I felt the opposite of that to Joe. I tried to slip away as fast as possible but he was able to give me a little present before I left. This present was a slip of paper entitled, "Dating Survey." Questions included: 1. Male or Female? 2. What qualities, other than "looks," makes a good first impression? and 3. What do you consider a fun, inexpensive date? Joe asked if I would fill out the survey and return it to him with my phone number by the end of church. You have got to be kidding me?! I've heard stories like these about singles ward but I never assumed them to be actually true. Furthermore, it did not end there. He kept following me around to see which Sunday School class I was going to. I finally lost him in Marriage Prep, but I had to endure an hour amongst couples massaging each other. I hate people in love. I finally left after the second hour not being able to stand any more of it. I am starting to question whether I should go inactive this summer. . . Totally kidding! The church is true even in a singles ward. However, I have learned to sit by the wall and avoid boys named Joe.

Moral of the Story: Marrying a guy after knowing him for two weeks is the way to go if it gets you out of a singles ward that much sooner.

Do as the Romans do . . .

I decided to take a half hour break after studying and work, and sat down to watch the end of "7 Brides for 7 Brothers." This is possibly one of my favorite musicals of all time which is probably why I've been so blinded to the ridiculousness of the story. I realize the six brothers had the whole dancing and ruggedness going for them, but if anyone decides to kidnap me and take me to a cabin in the middle of nowhere to marry me, i will kick their trash. However, i might break into song about being a June bride but I would have the decency to put clothes on because dancing in your underwear and shoes is just awkward. A huge fashion no-no. But I choose to overlook the felony and bad fashion because they conclude the musical with the only thing that makes sense - a shot gun wedding. Because apparently the only way to reward six grown men who kidnap your daughters and almost kill them in a snow land slide is obviously a shot gun wedding. Forget about actually checking if there are really seven babies in the house. Just hold a wedding on the spot because every baby needs a father even if the father is a singing, dancing, kidnapping lunatic.

Moral of the story: Don't ever name your daughter Dorcas unless you're willing to pay for her therapy three times a week.

White Chocolate

Imagine a skinny, little white girl running across campus last night at 11 pm. Not only that, but she was running in flip flops in a blizzard. Do you have the image in your head? Are you wondering what would have brought on such a outward display of nerdiness? Well, it was a result of a poorly misguided girl infected with procrastinate, something quite similar to kryptonite (shoutout to al's blog).
Anyways, it all started earlier that day when this girl decided to sleep in until 9. Not only that, but when she got to school, she decided it was wise to put off doing her five-page report that was due that night to play with wistie. (holler to wistie! thanks for setting up my blog). She decided that she wanted a break. Nay, she deserved a break after everything thing she had gone through the night/week before. So she set up her blog and ate lunch with wistie for three hours because this girl thought that she could finish her report after work. If her grandfather were here, he would say, "That's what you get for doin' your own thinkin'!"
Anyways, so she went to work and had to stay two hours after because there was an order for 400 pork balls the next day. What are pork balls, you might ask. . . well, they're spherish like sausage and eggs mixed together that take form to look and smell like vomit. So naturally she, and her coworkers, quickly nicknamed the pork balls to puke balls and spent the next two hours making them.
After work, this girl started work on her report on media effects on society. She worked and worked and then finally finished seven minutes to 11 pm aka the time it was due. This brings us to the beginning of our blog. This girl ran to make it to the Brimhall building before it would close. She was wearing her brown sweatshirt that said "hershey's milk chocolate" but by the time she made it across the campus, it was completely white with snow. The happy end to this story is that she did indeed make it to the Brimhall building by 10:58 pm and turned in her communications paper. While walking home that night, completely alone, bitterly cold, and slightly frost bitten; she entered her apartment and looked down at her sweatshirt only to realize she looked like white chocolate. She laughed pitifully and then went to bed. the end.

Moral of the story: don't write an entire story in third person. it's just annoying and creepy.

el primero

this is nori's first blog! but actually, nori isn't writing it. wistie is. that's because wistie is such a good friend. wistie made nori get a blog because wistie would like to read nori's ramblings because nori is a funny girl. stay tuned, hopefully she'll actually blog. 

the end